A "Fuck Off" kind of day... Tips to deal with it!

Have you ever had one of those days? You know, the ones where everything, no matter what or how, you do goes wrong or it's taken the wrong way? What am I saying? You're all humans here! Right? Gosh, I hope so... Of course you've had one or more of those days! It's natural! Those damnable days where all you want to do is scream at the world, post's title, FUCK OFF!

Fuck Off!

Well, I've just had, kinda still having, an unfortunate succession of those kind of days. And it was driving me crazy. Was, not is. And that's the point of this post, how to deal with it. You know me, I don't blog about this kind of things, too personal, but this is my personal blog! So I figured, let's give it a shot. Best case? People like it, and it does actually help someone going through a similar situation, which is the main reason I blog/vlog, to try and help. Worst case? You don't care about any of this, for you, just close the navigation tab! Don't worry, the review for tonight's GoT is still happening!

Let's start with a bit of background. Want to know more about me? Go check the links up there! I'll just say... I live in Venezuela. High crime rate (like ridiculously high, might get murdered while blogging this) and 3-digit inflation rates (might be 4-digits this year!). Tl;dr: Lots of stress, not many ways of relaxing. Also important for this post, I've been in a long term relationship for many years now. Everyone says people change when they get married, and, as far as I'm concerned, a long term relationship is like being married, just not legal. "Baby, I choose to love you every day, not because a piece of paper says so!" C'mon, gotta love that silver tongue...

Back to the topic at hand! During the past few days my family, friends, SO, our ISP, the mosquitoes, the global temperature, and everything and everyone else around me engaged in a plot to destroy me! It's the only logical explanation, it has to stop being "coincidence" after a bit, right? It overwhelmed me. Let me elaborate a bit without going into too much detail, for everyone's (specially mine) sake.

I might not be the brightest bulb, but I'm not an idiot. I know couples fight, they all do, they might be all smiles and kissed when they're in public, but, granted, they argue in private. There's no perfect relationship as much as there's no full compatibility with anyone. Relationships are about compromising, about negotiating. It's all about giving and receiving. And when one of the two people involved feels like he/she is giving more than receiving, there's trouble. Check out this wonderful explanation of it!

In my case, not going to deny it, my SO feels she's giving more, and considering how much of a dick I can be, she's probably right. The thing is, after a while, after too many a fight and feeling like the world is falling apart, sometimes you just get tired and don't feel like trying anymore. It's no one's fault. It's hard to focus, fight and give your best when you see no way of winning. You're losing the match 5-0, there's only 1 minute left, why would you even care?

But the funny thing about "Fuck Off" days is that, as the day goes by, the less you care for things, and the higher the amount of things that start to crumble. I was already angry, sad and tired, but I didn't know it was a fuck off day! So, surprise, surprise... It's family & friends time!

Now, I'm assuming you've already met the kind of people that only open their mouths to complain, to talk shit, or to criticize anything and everything they can. Yes, I'm talking about toxic people. If you don't know anyone like that, please, don't meet more people. Thing is, I'm the proud member of a somewhat big family. And, the bigger the family, the more toxic members it has, in my particular case, a few close ones.

Toxicness ahead!
Needless to say, not 5 seconds after I was done arguing with my SO I started to look upset. That's the moment they were waiting for, behold the toxicness! Worst thing? If it's family, you have to take it, at least that's what I do. Why? Sad story. Summing up, I lost one my cousins almost 5 years ago and it's still bloody hard to talk and/or write about it. After that accident, I said to myself that no matter how much I wanna punch some of them sometimes, I'd try to enjoy my family as much as I possibly can. Trust me, not an easy promise to keep... Alright, tears have been drained! That was family, but, what about toxic friends? Ditch them. It's not worth it, believe you me.

For your non-toxic buddies, there are 2 kinds, or at least that's what I experienced. You're having the shittiest day, the first kind, they just can't handle it, they expect you to be as cool, easy going and fun as you always are, and don't get me wrong, you're trying, but it's impossible, really. At some point you're going to be a jerk to them, involuntarily of course, and if they start giving you shit about it, the best you can do is say "sorry" and stay away from them till things get better. I'll be rude and call this group "the insensitive crybabies", and that just might be unnecessarily mean, they just might be having a hard day too. I was, of course, unaware of these tips I'm giving you now, so I fell in the trap of fighting back and explaining why, in one of my worst days ever, I was entitled, a little bit, to be a dick. An argument without winners.

The second group tho, guys, I LOVE YOU! They deal with your shit, they embrace it! They support, respect and motivate you. They're the silver lining of the fuck off day cloud! If any of you is reading this, thank you. They are the ones that actually help you through it. Best thing about them? They also know when to leave you alone so you can deal with it. Kudos.

So, the day is over... If you're lucky, it's just one day, if you're like me, it's a shitty day streak, but, eventually, it's over. Yet you know, when you wake up that next day after the storm, it's not really all sun and roses, cause nothing's been fixed yet! You've just finally stopped being overwhelmed by it all. I still have/had to figure out things with my SO, still have to deal with family, still am somewhat pissed at some of my friends.

My recommendation here... Be alone. Think. Go jogging, hit the gym, if you're like super lazy just put on the headphones and get lost in music. The thing is, find time for you. Try to look at things from another perspective. Everything is easier when you look at it from far away, it looks smaller! That's what I did, and then it hit me, it was all on me! I'm not saying everything was my fault, no, but I figured I'm the one that must decide how to face all of it. No people, it's not about faking a smile and pretending everything's fine, that's just lying. It's about stepping aside, thinking, finding peace. Don't go overboard and try to solve everyone's problems, don't even try to solve all your problems, make a list, pick the easiest one (of yours), fix it. Keep going. It's like a big puzzle, it's daunting when you look at all those pieces just standing there, but you place the corners and work your way in, it'll eventually be over.

Take your time...
Have I fixed all my shit? Hell, no. I've still got to figure out a lot of what happened this past few days, and I'm still tired, I still feel sad, but I'm getting there. One step at a time. And whatever I'm not working on at the moment comes nagging, I just say "Fuck Off, for now!".

I tried not to offend anyone, not to rant too much, if I did, I'm sorry. I don't do posts this personal, it's a new ground for me, I must say it does help to vent and cool down. So, there you go, shitty day? Blog about it!

This rant turned motivational post is over now, sorry if went too Oprah at some point, I'm definitely going to now... Remember this, you're all awesome! You all have a unique story, that makes you all interesting! Believe in yourselves, don't let life bring you down because it'll keep you there. Confidence my friends, sexiest shit ever!

If you like this post or it helped you in any way, please comment so. And, if you can help, help me by sharing it! Thanks for reading!!!

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